Prose of life | Academy of Life

How to outdo Hitchcock? Grape cat

In the house we had two cats. A dignified, sedate old-timer Murlik and the thin black nouveau riche Djinn. He was taken to raise the tone of Murlyk, but instead of the cat's tone, our human took off. All day long, we and her mother-in-law ran, trying to calm the ubiquitous black legs. Paws had fun with might and main and did not want to calm down.

Why would Charles Darwin love Russia?

Charles Darwin would also be happy to travel by train in Russia if he had the opportunity. But since Charles Darwin still has some difficulties with leaving Westminster Abbey, I will tell you with great pleasure what feelings he would have experienced from such a journey.

Is it good to gnaw seeds?

In this age of nanotechnology, interest in seeds does not dry out. Search engines are bombarded with queries: is it harmful if there are a lot of seeds; what dreams of buying sunflower seeds; all about the benefits of seeds; Do they get fat from the seeds? how to fry sunflower seeds; how many seeds in 1 meter cubic; what is the profit from sunflower seeds; Is it possible for pregnant women to have sunflower seeds? fried seeds for libido ... Then you can not continue.

How is beer-wine-vodka tasting? Humorous report

Judging by your faces, you did not spend yesterday evening at the Bolshoi Theater, or at the Tretyakov Gallery, or even at the Darwin Museum, so for the beginning I advise you to taste “Hunt Strong” beer. Beer "Hunt strong" is not really beer. To be honest, this is not a beer at all. This is a unique lifestyle, a very special way of thinking, in a word, a certain elite private club, which you can get into only on the recommendation of its members, which are becoming smaller every day ... Take a sip, but do not swallow ... Rinse your mouth, because the taste of beer at the root of the tongue, back of the mouth ... Feel?

How to deal with the budget deficit? Practical recommendations

Here, another sent. From the Ombudsman. And he got it ... From the Presidential Administration received! And the head of the Gorfo on the planning meeting at the Head also got out. He threw his spoon of honey in our direction. The budget, they say, should be replenished. And then a week later salary. Do you think, supposedly, to receive it? Get ready, Inga! Where, where ... On Kudykin Mountain.

How does Vladimir Putin really work and why do I know about it?

But I was personally convinced that the times when people wrote tearful letters to Ilyich and received real help from the state turned out not to have sunk into oblivion. And after that, how not to be proud of our President! It all started with the fact that we moved to another area. I was pregnant, it became problematic to carry the eldest son to distant lands in the former kindergarten, and my husband and I thought about moving to the kindergarten closer: one was right in the yard, the other was across the road.

Brinerdin, or How to fail teaching?

My friend and I got a charismatic, lonely philologist, who considered all trainees as her foolish children. As it turned out, she was right! Our mentor not only shared with us the secrets of pedagogical skills - she tried to introduce us to culture and integrate into the local beau monde, however, both of them were unsuccessful: I never learned to distinguish Stadler from Sondetskis, admire Italian neo-realism and support the market local intellectual get-together.

How did my friend beat a heavy illness? Life story

I want to tell a story from a life that happened to my mom's girlfriend. Her name is Lyudmila Nikolaevna, but for me she is just Aunt Lucy. She is a very sociable woman, PhD. She has been working in the university for many years, where she lectures, conducts summer practice, has many graduates with whom she maintains contacts even after graduation.

Why do "ichthyologists" from Straw so much dislike reading books?

Who has the desire - he can see. Well, whoever doesn’t have it or doesn’t have enough time, I can confirm it as almost local, it’s a normal area. You could even say good. The lake - this is it, came out of the house and from the porch: ryapushku there what or smelt - a fishing rod directly into her stomach. The bathhouse is again ... And the boys there, in the Straw, everything is completely poachers.

Hostage, or What are the children of oligarchs capable of?

“Can you do it?” The governess of ten-year-old girls and girls asks anxiously. I have to determine what they can do. The children look at me with hostility and continue the conversation started outside the door: “Why did you bring us here? Remember what you promised? ”I find it funny. With these kittens? I, the tiger tamer?

Well, what can I say about ... SeSheA?

Upon arrival in the US, we lived with my son, I did not work for more than a year and went to the nearest warehouses and enterprises for a job as a loader or someone else of low qualification. Good to have children in their declining years. My son, when he arrived in the United States ten years ago, also began his career with a locker in a supermarket and advised me his “glorious way” to conquer America.

How to write letters to the minister?

I made something up there, in the spirit of high-sounding appeals, which they, the big people of our small planet, either really like so much, or so it’s common for us, little people, to assume that they love them so much, and gave everything This is to check your boss. He frowned as important as all the small chiefs of large enterprises like, ran once or twice this pretentious tirade from thin, but not completely imperceptible flattery, loud reassurances and immodest promises, corrected the wrong comma in the wrong place and, nodding a little kindly and befits a small but serious boss, dissatisfied with his broken-out subordinates, returned the letter to me.

Are the lanes faster? From the cycle "Shuttle bikes from Karpov"

I liked the guy, slowly became almost a family, Sima made friends with his wife Masha, and we often even spent the night in their apartment, from where it was much closer to Belorussky railway station. In the morning Leshka scored with his luggage his Volkswagen golf, we somehow squeezed into the salon and set off to meet new adventures.

How does a cat live among people? Monologue cat-queen

At the age of ... oh, at the most tender age I was taken into the house. I immediately laid the foot on the hand of my future mistress. She was not stupid and immediately realized that from now on she was MY mistress! I was called Frantiska (I would prefer Francesca, but this is also good), showed bowls for food and water, a place to sleep and a nook for personal use.

Why do we love trains?

The prim inhabitants of the temporary railway transportation unit are shackled, their hands are on their knees or on the edges of a readable newspaper-magazine. They all stared off into the distance or up close and seemed not to notice you. Everyone has stumbled into phones or iPhones, laptops or books, and the constant thought in such cases flashes in my head: “I’ve gotten into a mess - some snobs!

How to use gravity?

In my opinion, complete garbage. Personally, I think that the force of attraction is the materialization of our desires, and which particles are responsible for this materialization is the tenth thing. People just wanted the Sun to always illuminate the Earth, and now our planet revolves around a huge hot ball. Astronomers, looking into their tubes with glass inserts, dreamed of finding the same ordered systems in the vastness of space.

How to get to the Old Kukkovka? Monologue "bombili"

Then do not pretend to be a connoisseur. And just say - "I am on" ... On Kotovsky? By the way, Kotovsky is both a street and an alley. So you? ... Alley? Well, this is Old Kukkovka. It was necessary from the station directly along Krasnoarmeiskaya and through Rovio. That's what we are with you flooded Drevlyanka? Right now, or return to the center.

How to take a photo? My history

Amateur print photos had the appropriate equipment. We even had photography books at home. Printing black and white photographs was simpler and cheaper than color and therefore was more common. In our family, the camera appeared in 1957 - Dad bought the "Sharp-2C". The last photos on our equipment were printed by my younger brother in 1986.

And what just does not happen on the exams? Student tales

So at that time, that was remembered today ... We handed over electrical engineering. First, the second group of students showed their knowledge with their faces - both in profile and in full face - it showed, in a day or two - ours, the first. The pioneers of the exam was formed ... Well, oh, very hard! Five - none. Fours - small-small. Most of the group received threefolds, and five people in general ... They left the audience with a clean record.

Gray hair in the head - a question on the edge?

- What do you mean why? To look better. Younger in the end. I ran my hand through my hair and grimaced. As if burned. Each time after dyeing the hair, the scalp hurts as if it had been torn off first and then sewn back. The fact is that I had a gray hair early. After painting it every 5–6 weeks for many years, I developed some kind of abnormal sensitivity to this procedure.